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S2 Ep1 Knot's Landing - Season Two Premiere: The "Hitchhiker" The" A Hundred Dollars or I'll Holler!!" Episode

• Jett Shae • Episode 215

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Welcome Back Soap Fiends!! Icouldn't help myself. Its the triumphant return of the Spin Off Sensation Knots Landing!! What if the seemingly perfect neighborhood of "Knots Landing" was hiding secrets that could tear families apart? Join us for the season two premiere of Soap Lore, where we reflect on the intricate lives of Karen and Sid Farragate, their resilience in marriage, and the tantalizing crossover hints with the Ewings from "Dallas." We remember the high stakes and raw emotions from season one, setting the stage for a gripping new chapter.

Sid's journey takes an unexpected turn when he picks up a mysterious hitchhiker on his way to Diana’s talent show, an event that stirs the pot in the neighborhood with the arrival of Sid’s newly divorced sister, Abby, and her quirky kids. As Karen wrestles with the decision to trust Richard amidst Sid’s legal troubles, tensions flare at a neighborhood gathering, leading to some explosive kitchen conversations. The dynamic of old and new relationships creates a tapestry of drama that keeps us on the edge of our seats.

Finally, we touch on a poignant moment of parental bonding as a young girl finds comfort amid her parents’ impending divorce through storytime with Vidalia. As Abby’s flirtatious antics add another layer of complexity, we gear up for the continued saga of clearing Sid’s name and safeguarding loved ones. This episode promises a rollercoaster of emotions, suspense, and nostalgic moments that will captivate both new listeners and diehard fans of "Knox Landing.

Speaker 1:

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome and welcome back to Soap Lore, the official gathering place for newbies, novices and OG diehard fans of the golden age of primetime. I'm your host, jet, and I couldn't wait another day. We're jumping into the season two premiere of Knox Landing. That's right. We're back on the West Coast doing the absolute most on this season premiere. So, whether you're new to this or true to this, sit back and enjoy. Tell the kids it's time to play outside, or outside. Tell them no questions, suggestions or concerns for the next 35, 45 minutes. Everyone else in their shop. Be cool, be quiet, or you definitely will be kicked out because this is a series a year. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, this is Sew4. Welcome back, party people, to another fun-filled edition of Sew4. I am Post Jet Sew Queen doing one of the most iconic sew poppers of all time, or so I hear. Tell you what guys.

Speaker 1:

I get more comments about Knott's Landing than I do anything else. Knott's Landing and Falcon Crest, which is not ironic. I've said this several times. I didn't know these two shows While I knew Knott's Landing existed, never heard of Falcon Crest. But I can see why People keep telling me if you like Knott's Landing. Now you're going to love it. You're going to love it as time goes on, which is really good to hear, because it seems like most shows hit their peak around season four or five and then they just kind of fall off or maybe they continue to pick up steam. I'm thinking of Grey's Anatomy. As I say this out loud and honestly, I hadn't watched it in many, many moons. There's no need to do that anymore. You know what I mean. It's on streaming. There's like 22 seasons. I'm fine with missing 10 of those. I'm sure I can catch up, which is exactly what we're going to do on this episode of Soap Lore. So opening season or, excuse me, opening episode, season two is a two parter, which is awesome, because season one by and large seems to be the get to know you phase of a show, any show, whether it's a comedy, drama, whatever.

Speaker 1:

I personally enjoyed this. I enjoyed Knott's Landing so much because I feel like I really got to know each and every one of the characters. You get to know their dirt, you get to see their good side, you get to see that they're actually just regular, regular people going through it, trying to make it in America with each other, and they have built this really beautiful, solid friendship. Now let's do a little review. If this is your first time listening to the show, welcome. No joke, you picked a good time. If I were you, I would start with Knott's Landing. Go back Actually no, start with Dallas and then start with Knott's Landing, because there's a little bit of a crossover there.

Speaker 1:

They mentioned it just slightly here. They're hinting at it and I kind of wonder how that's going to play out for the rest of the season. I know you OGs know this, but is Gary Ewing a big fish in LA? Doesn't seem like he would be. I know that they're setting up a few things out on the West Coast. So far I'm on season four. What is it like? Episode seven or eight of Dallas? They're not talking a lot about California. I think they mentioned Gary a couple of times, but it hasn't been. They haven't been talking about anything on the West Coast. They're not talking about keeping the environment clean or their image or anything like that. But I imagine that's something they just put in the back burner. If they need to pull a rabbit out of a hat at some point, the ratings dip down. I'm sure they can just pull it out, which is the best thing about a spinoff, in my opinion.

Speaker 1:

But let's go over some particulars. We have Karen and Sid Farragate happily married couple. This is Karen's first marriage, sid's second. His first wife was a bit of a skank. She came back through trying to get that old thing back because she was bored, but she ends up sleeping with their neighbor Richard, which we'll get to in a minute. Sid and Karen have a really good marriage. She had the opportunity to cheat on him, but she didn't. She just wanted to see if she still had it, which she did. She wanted to respect herself afterwards, so she moved on. He had the opportunity to cheat too. He just doesn't, is that right? He had the opportunity. Yeah, he could have cheated with his ex. He didn't. They keep each other in the loop. Their thing is warm and wonderful. They love their home. They love their business. You know they're kind of the backbone of the neighborhood. Karen, is this really? I love Karen.

Speaker 1:

Karen's my favorite person on the show. She's strong, she's opinionated and she's kind of that chick. She's the PTA Karen of 1979. Not like a Karen today. You know what I mean. She's cool, she'll get you where you need to go, but she'll also put you back in your place. They've had their up and down, they lost a baby, but you know they're solid on solid ground Now. Their neighbors are, of course, the Texas Ewing Gary Ewing, and almost called her Vanita again. See, it's been too long it's been. Her name is not Vanita or Valvaline, but her name is Valine.

Speaker 1:

The Vidalia Onion Queen Until further notice. I just don't see that going away. Onion queen until further notice. I just don't see that going away. She is southern charm in all the right spots, kind of sweet, down-home girl who was married and divorced by the time she was 16, run off into some hall or somewhere. She's been cleaning plates, bussing tables for the last 17, 18 years. She got, got her baby back, then messed around and got her man back. Now she's had to tiptoe around him on the account of him being a drunk and a little bit immature.

Speaker 1:

Gary, on the other hand, turns out, once he's away from Texas and Las Vegas, anything sort of tempting. He turned out to be one hell of a salesman. Matter of fact, he's got that Ewing thing. He just doesn't have it for oil. So he's doing well on the west coast, except he has a little slip up. One day has a little bit too much to drink and then he went on a full bender. I mean up and down knots landings coast. He's drinking warm booze. He's stealing booze from people. He's having fistfights in random restaurants not restaurant in random bars. He's sneaking in and out of rehab. He has a homeboy who ruined he ruined his friend's speech, by the way, I have yet to forgive him for that. Mr Khalid was given a beautiful I'm going home speech when Gary's like um, hey, everybody, by the way, I'm a drunk. We know that, gary, but you know what? It's okay. We got to see a little bit of him on Dallas evangelizing the wonderfulness of 12 Steps. We know he's on that straight and narrow. He's, as far as we know, back on that wagon and he and Valene, the Vidalia Onion Queen, seem to be doing just fine. She got her GED, she's got her mind right, she's ready and she's focused.

Speaker 1:

Okay, now the two other couples. You got Laura and Richard. Now Laura is a stay-at-home mom who has someone of a checkered past. A couple episodes into the first season. She has an experience, let's just call it that, and apparently she's done this before, or maybe she felt like she had to. I don't know, they don't really really get into it.

Speaker 1:

But what we know is that Richard sort of seems, he seems to be very sensitive in some spots when it comes to her and then in other other parts of their marriage he's just not. You can tell he kind of thinks she's dumb. She plays the part. She has to placate him all the time. She knows soft words You're the man, you're the man, you're the man, even though she stands like four inches taller than him. And there's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with a short king, so long as he knows he's a king. Richard does not. Richard's got that slick mouth. He's always popping off saying the wrong thing. He's a little bit power hungry because he doesn't have the power that he wants at his law firm and he ended up having a rendezvous with Sid's ex-wife. So keep that in mind.

Speaker 1:

Now Karen knows this. Karen feels a way, but she's going to keep her mouth shut for the sake of keeping the peace. It's for the greater good, right? Well, richard, at some point, you know, they start having a little bit of money trouble and blah, blah, blah. Karen convinces her father to loan her the money to take care of whatever they need to take care of. But the gotcha gotcha is that she's going to pay him back, not Richard, meaning she's going to leave this house. She's not going to be standing around making sandwiches while he's out doing God knows what with God knows whom. She's going to go out and get a job. He agrees to it. That's where we stand at this one. Now, the most kind of this couple is definitely there. They're not always there, though. They're there just enough to where you don't forget about them, at least.

Speaker 1:

Ginger I hadn't forgot about her, but Ginger and Kenny. Now, kenny looks like one of those Jenners. Okay, in the heyday he would have been Caitlyn Jenner's baby brother for sure. I was going to say first cousin. Now, same genes May or may not have a chin implant. It's irrelevant, don't matter. He's fine. Fine, that's what I need you to know. But he's also slimy. He likes to have these little swinger parties.

Speaker 1:

Ginger's not really into that anymore. You know she teaches kindergarten. She's molding young minds. She wants to go to work. She wants to mind her business. Turns out she has a little bit of a past too. When she was 16, she fell in love with this boy. They got pregnant. Her mama made her have an abortion. He ends up dying. His mom ends up being a stalker, like sending stuff to her. Eight years later it's a whole mess. So in the midst of all this, ginger is carrying these secrets. She's finally sticking up for herself a little bit.

Speaker 1:

When it comes to the Kenny, I don't care if you're a record producer, you need to be in this house. I'm not trying to go to these parties, you need to be home some more. And he's like oh baby, you know what I mean. I gotta mix and mingle, mingle and mix. I'm working late because he sleeps with singers. That's his whole thing. So he is inevitably caught sleeping with a singer I use that word very loosely A woman who was caterwauling in his studio. Ginger happens upon them, sees it and tells him to get him and all of his things out of her house. It's over, we are separated. So that's where we are at the top of our house. It's over, we are separated. So that's where we are at the top of season two.

Speaker 1:

Now I was pleasantly surprised to find that we still have the original cast. If I'm looking at this objectively, it doesn't seem like this was shot very much later than season one. So I would imagine they did you know 10 or 12 episodes. I think it was 12 episodes. I think, yeah, 12 episodes for the first one for the pilot season, and then they went ahead and shot 22 more. So I'm sure they had like a five month break, three month break, whatever. Nobody looks that different. Keep that in mind. Since this is a two parter, we're going to review episodes one and two and I think we'll just kind of keep up that pace, because now I'm curious. I need to see what's going on with everybody, and this one was fantastic.

Speaker 1:

One of the things that strikes me the most about this episode excuse me, this soap opera versus the others is that these people are genuinely friends for the most part. Gary already admitted to Richard I don't really like you, like that. Richard's like cool. I know you don't like like me. Don't think, because you're drunk, that I won't put you in jail. I will absolutely sue you, little drunk behind from here to kingdom come don't play with me. So they're not the best of friends. But everybody's wives get along, so that you know they're coping. I'm sure Karen feels a way about Richard, but she keeps it to herself. I'm sure all the women feel a way about Kenny, but you know they keep it to themselves for the sake of gender.

Speaker 1:

Now, usually on season two you eliminate the boring characters ie, matthew and Lindsay from Dynasty Goodbye, never saw them again so far but usually bring in a couple new people. As far as I can tell, we brought in one woman and two children and she looks just like Ginger. So I had a little bit of. I was a little bit confused. I watched it twice and I'm like, okay, god, they're going to have to change her hair color or something at some point.

Speaker 1:

But, guys, there's so much to get into. We have to talk about the relationship between all of the Knotts, landingers, the Knotty I don't know what should we call them the Knotheads, the Knotts, whatever, gary and them, their relationship with each other. We're starting to see that fabric be torn apart a little bit. I believe they squeezed a new house into the cul-de-sac. Maybe I hadn't been paying attention. It is always my policy generally to kind of skip through the opening credits, but I'm thinking I should probably watch that a little more closely now because I feel like they squeezed in a house that was not there before. We'll get into all of that on this episode, so get settled in, grab yourself something refreshing, cut yourself up a cute little charcuterie before we're back at Nod's Landing.

Speaker 1:

All right, so the first person to grace our screen is Sid, and Sid looks fantastic. I almost said a true, I did a triple take. I didn't almost do anything, I did a triple take. I'm like, wow, he looks really good. I can't tell if he maybe gained a little muscle, maybe they just cut his hair or something. He looks wonderful. He's sitting in his car. I've always found him to be a little bit too aloof for me personally, but he's, I mean, he's vibing out in his car. It's under the cloak of darkness.

Speaker 1:

He seems to be on his way to Diana, who's their daughter, the high school. Now you know Karen's there, she's backstage. It is a Knott's Landing high talent show. Diana, or Diane's, got a new little boyfriend and he is dressed as Gene Simmons. Immediately I'm like, oh, okay, cool. So he's in a band and you know she's. Diane's like mama, he's so cute. And Karen's like yeah, yeah, karen is still her, she's still running teens. She is telling the stage manager the stage manager what is and isn't going to happen. Basically, she's trying to kill a little bit of time because Sid is on his way.

Speaker 1:

So I've watched the first episode twice. I will admit I was kind of in and out. I had a couple things going on. I'm trying to work and do it at the same time, which isn't smart. That was a whole point of watching these shows is to unplug. But I digress.

Speaker 1:

Sid is on his way to the talent show. Hopefully they don't really know that, because Sid's little sister just got a divorce. She's a new lady on the show, she's just got a divorce and, if I'm understanding this right, she is driving from somewhere up north, I suppose, and Knott's Landing would be right about the halfway mark and then she, can, you know, continue on her trek further south. I believe she was going to move to San Diego. First time I realized Knott's Landing is in LA, found that out at the end of episode two. So cool, now I have a little bit better geography, I understand where everybody's at. So he was going to meet her. All this isn't revealed right away, but he was either going to meet his sister if she needed him to like, if they made it to Knott's Landing in time. I guess that was a plan, but it didn't seem like, you know, everything's fine. She ended up leaving a little later or something. So he's on his way to the talent show under the cloak of darkness. Now I'm going to drop some dimes that make sense Now, after I've watched it twice.

Speaker 1:

Sid is bending the bog, he's turning the corner. He stops at the stoplight right outside the salami shop A young girl. You can tell she's a teenager, she's probably 17, 18, something like that. She comes over to the car and she's like you know, can you help me out? Can you give me a ride? I'm hitchhiking. Oh, that was fast.

Speaker 1:

I was thinking when I read the title hitchhiker. I was thinking some weirdo comes into town, kind of like that Kmart, evil, knievel, dirt biking. I was thinking something like that. But this makes a little more sense because we already used that storyline not too long ago. He goes oh, no, no, no, I can't, I'm not going to give you a ride. She said oh, come on, it'll be, it's great for the environment. I was thinking to myself you know what's even better for the environment? You keeping all of your Eunice outside of his luxury automobile? You walking is even better for the environment. I mean, I guess she's right, you're killing two birds with one stone. You're already going this way. And then I thought to myself if she's hitchhiking in quotations across North Atlantic, that's not hitchhiking. Hitchhiking is across the country. Right, baby, you need a ride. Can you give me a lift? Is what she needed? Doesn't matter, sid has somewhere to be. Can't make it. Sorry, darling, I got to go.

Speaker 1:

So he starts driving off and as he's driving off, something catches his eye. He looks in his rear view. Wait, before we go there, I promise guys, I'm going to stay on track. There's all these little side notes that are popping in my head because I'm just like okay, this is 1979, 1980.

Speaker 1:

Sid didn't do the reach across the seat and roll, roll, roll the window down. Obviously that doesn't work in a TV show because it takes up too much time. He's going to keep bopping in and out of frame. It's going to look funny. He had the luxury windows and I'm like, oh my gosh, that's so cool, I guess. I mean, I'm sure it was a thing, I'm sure it wasn't in every single car, but he was in like a smaller Lincoln to me, like a Lincoln coupe is what it looks like he's. He looks a little bit like money. He looks very nice because he's going to the, to the show. Normally he'd be in his dirty clothes and I think we could have avoided this entire fiasco. But I'm not victim blaming here. Okay, let's continue.

Speaker 1:

Sid, in his little two seater or his, excuse me, his coupe, is driving and something catches his eye. He looks in the rearview mirror and what does he see? He sees a van pull up next to this young girl and this guy gets out and he's like talking. He can hear him because his window's still down right. He's all the guy's like hey, why don't you come with us? Why don't you come with us? And then two other guys get out of the van Like, oh my God, sid is. Oh my goodness, no, no, no, Can't be on his conscience. He's on his way to see his daughter. This girl's no older than his. He reverses, he makes her get in the car, or she gets in the car willingly, and then they head off and they're making small talk.

Speaker 1:

What's your name? My name is. I forget her name at the moment. How could I forget? Her name is Pam. Pam seems to be just kind of one of those likable kids. She's not scared. That's what, sid. That's the first thing. He's like you weren't afraid of those guys back there. She's like no, the world's filled with heroes. She, she knew. She just knew someone's going to come along and help her out. She was unbothered by it. But she's going on and on. What's your name? Oh, yeah, sid, I heard that name on a tv movie blah, blah, blah. So things are going fine.

Speaker 1:

He tells her he's on his way to his daughter's talent show. So, honey, this, I can get you to Nos Landing High, and that's about it. She's like okay, that's no problem, I can figure it out from there. Well then, she goes. Well, sid, you got any money? He's like uh, okay, yeah, how much you got a hundred?

Speaker 1:

He's maybe he's treating her like an annoying daughter. You know he has a. He has a very bratty teenage daughter. So he's just like yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, maybe I do. She goes can I have it? And he's kind of laughing like no, sorry, I can't help you girl. No, absolutely no, I can. I can drop you off where you need to go and she goes. But you know I'm trying to drop you off where you need to go and she goes. But you know I'm trying to get on this bus. I need to go way over here. He goes well, what. I'll buy you a bus ticket, but I'm not gonna give you cash. I just don't feel comfortable doing it.

Speaker 1:

So she's still just as calm as a cucumber. She's like oh well, I think you should, because if you don't I'm gonna scream rape. And he's laughing so like, yeah right, obviously it's just the two of them in the car, so he's not super worried about it. And who says that? He doesn't believe her? So they're driving and they're almost to like this chicken spot. There's a bunch of cops standing outside. He goes well, there's your chance. You want to scream rape, go for it.

Speaker 1:

So she looks over and he's calling her bluff. Where he's calling her bluff, she looks like she's just going to sit down and shut up, but instead she begins screaming rape, help, help, help. She's grabbing the steering wheel. She's swerving the car all over the road. The cops at the chicken spot see her like what the heck Sid is like, freaking out because she's like hitting him and swerving the car. So he manages to pull over where the cops are. He's thinking let me go get me some help too. So he pulls over. He didn't get out of the car. She jumps out, she jumps in the arms of a cop and he's just like sitting there like, wow, that was intense. They come over, snatch him out the car, put your hands on top of your head. He's shook. What what? Okay, okay, everybody keep their wits about them. This is just. You know we can get through this. Let's just let me explain the situation. His clothes are all on. Her clothes are all intact. There's definitely no bruises on her body, punches on his face. You know there's this is me who's watched enough CSI to be like, oh, he's going to be okay. You know it'll be fine. It'll be fine, not so Meanwhile.

Speaker 1:

So meanwhile, back at Knott's Landing High, the talent show is in full swing. Like I said, karen was pulling the strings backstage. She's telling the stage manner what is and isn't going to happen. Finally, she can't wait any longer. So Diana's boyfriend is in this Kiss cover band and they are all dressed up. They didn't do the hair, but you know we're going to let it ride. They're teenage kids, it's fine. It's fine. They turn out to be pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. So the first thing I think is wow, northlanding had that budget this season. They don't have that corny music. I spoke too soon, so these kids are killing it.

Speaker 1:

The drums are drumming, the neering, it is sounding wonderful, the crowd is hype, everybody is loving it, yeah, yeah. So what happens? Their time comes to an end and the crowd is going nuts. So Karen's like oh yeah, encore, baby, encore. The crowd wants an encore. Stage manager's like Mrs Farragate, please, we have other people Encore. I said encore, so the kids play another song. It's by sid. Even more time. But, unbeknownst to her, sid is in the clink. It doesn't matter, he can have all the time in the world. He ain't going nowhere, at least not tonight.

Speaker 1:

So we, as the audience, are blessed with a talented diana, or diane. Now she's following a two-time performance shouting Kiss cover band, who's doing really, really well, and she and her homegirls she has turned two girls. They're dressed like they're tap dancers. They're dressed in a leotard and like a vest with tails. They've got the sparkly top hat, the gloves. They're going to do us a little tappity, tap dance. Now, I was thinking the whole time that the Kiss cover band was playing. There's no words to the music. So I'm like so they didn't have the licensing to like, do a song. Maybe they don't, maybe she'll just tap dance. Oh, unfortunately that was not the case.

Speaker 1:

Diana was apparently Diana Ross of the Supremes is front and center and she starts clickety clap, clickety clap, clickety, clickety, clickety clap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap and she starts giving her best. Liza Minnelli. Only, she sounds a whole lot like that girl that Kenny was sleeping with. She is caterwauling the song. It is terrible. Oh my God, when is this going to be over? And she's singing hard and loud and all off key. If the keys are right in front of her, y'all she's doing back flips away from them. She is matrix, dodging the proper notes. It is, oh, and it's worse, clickety-clack, clickety-clack. The tap dancing was on point. They look good, sounded terrible. So if you watch it, watch it on mute, don't, don't, don't play yourself. Okay, she gets through all of that and yeah, nothing. I don't think they won. I don't even remember that part, because by this point they flash back to Richard. Excuse me to? Yeah, they do. They flash to Richard and Laura and Richard's going to receive a call from Sid who's in the clink.

Speaker 1:

So Karen is walking around her room and Richard is doing hot yoga or something, without the heat he's on, he's. All we can see is his feet in the air. He looks like an Olympic diver. He's just kind of feet stretched in the air. He's on the other side of the bed and she's excited. She's like, oh my God, I had the best day ever at work today and he's trying to be shady. Mind you, they lost the money. They almost lost their home because he got into this bad investment, blew their savings. Her father gave them the loan, with the exception that she was going to be the one to pay him back. Her father, him back, her father. That is so.

Speaker 1:

She got this job at a real estate firm, but what all she's doing right now? All she's doing is she's stuffing letters, she's doing contracts, she's doing admin work and she's excited by it like whoa. I can't believe it. This is that he keeps trying to reduce her joy. He can't take the fact that she has something going on that he agreed to and that she's excited about it.

Speaker 1:

You're a glorified stamp licker. All you're doing is licking envelopes. Oh, mind you, he's got his toy, his toes pointed straight up in the air. All we see is booty, thigh, calves and toes. It's one thing. To be insulting, it's quite another. I will never be insulted by someone with their toes pointed. That's just not going to happen.

Speaker 1:

So luckily, the phone rings. He comes out of his head head stand stance answers the phone. It's Sid. Like Sid's, like yo. Could you go get Karen? She's at the school with Diana. I need you to come down to the jail. I've been arrested the heck. Yeah, he gets dressed, he goes and he does all the things. To the jail. I've been arrested. What the heck? Yeah, he gets dressed, he goes and he does all the things. So they get down there and we, the audience, get to see the entire jailhouse. So they have Sid sitting in, like the little holding tank they sit you in if you're drunk Not that I don't know, but he's sitting in that tank.

Speaker 1:

Pam is flirting with the cops. She's sitting on the desk, she's laughing and she's giving her statement and her story is Sid was going to pick me up, but then he didn't. And then he saw these guys oh no, she leaves this part out. He was going to pick me up, get in the car. He starts soliciting me. I said no. Luckily I saw the cops. I started fighting him off, blah, blah, blah. Well, one of the the chiefs comes by and he sees Sid in the tanks. We pulls him in his office, it tells him his version.

Speaker 1:

Now here comes Karen, karen's here and Richard's here about the same time. Now all the men folk seem to think that this is going to blow over. This is her word against your word. There's no physical evidence. Um, there's really no reason to believe this. This will probably be fine, she'll probably not even. You know, they're not even taking it super serious that everyone thinks it's going to fall apart, except Karen, because Karen is sitting and she's watching this girl. She's watching her flirt. She sees how happy she is and she's like this little girl's lying on my man, first and foremost, so just to be safe. She she's like sit, I want us. I love Richard, I do, but I think we need a criminal lawyer for this. He's like no, no, no, no, no, let's just, richard's going to be fine.

Speaker 1:

So as they raise up to walk out of the police station, press is discreetly there and Pam sees them stand up. So she yelling you're gonna let him go. How dare you? He tried to rape me. He's a pervert.

Speaker 1:

Now Karen is not having a she little girl. Look, my man did not, he would never. She's going back and forth with her. Well, the little girl likes this. Right, she's very controlled, which is terrifying. She's very controlled with it. She's like oh, I feel so sorry for you. You don't know anything about your husband. He's a pervert. He likes him young too. He was trying to rape me. He was telling me what the men in the van were gonna do to me. He made me get in the car. She's going on and off and on. Karen's getting hotter and hotter. This is the perfect time if you're in the press, because he's got a job to do. He snaps a picture of Karen going apeshit over the side of this little partition that they have in there.

Speaker 1:

They go home and that's kind of the vibe of the first episode. It's like we're not going to take this too seriously. Let her finish her statement and everything will blow over. But Karen's like no, I don't think so. I really don't. After she saw that outburst from the little girl, she's like no, something's about to go down. Well, it goes down, it does. The girl has a wonderful statement.

Speaker 1:

I hate to say this, but this is TV. I can say things that I wouldn't say in real life. So her vibe is this yes, I like to have a good time. Maybe I hook up with men? Maybe I don't, but I said no and this man tried to attack me. He tried to attack me. Why would I lie about that? And that's a great defense. If you're like, I'm going to be very honest in everything that I do. I'm not ashamed of my rendezvous in or outside of this police station. I do what I do. I'm not ashamed of my rendezvous in or outside of this police station. I do what I do.

Speaker 1:

So by this point they, being Karen and Richard and Sid decide okay, we're going to take this seriously. It's safe to say that Karen is taking it the most serious because she understands this is a devastating accusation, whether it's true or not. In a court of public opinion the optics aren't great. Now, yes, not landing knows this man? He has no record. No one else has ever gotten kind of a weird vibe off of him. But why would this girl who tells the truth about everything else lie about this thing? That's kind of the whole setup.

Speaker 1:

So, karen, for the majority of this first episode she is pushing Sid to get a criminal lawyer. She's like I know a guy got the best in town. Let's do it. Sid is being loyal to Richard and just very trustworthy because again he knows he didn't do anything and he trusts Richard. He's like listen, I can't do that to Rich. First and foremost, that's my friend. Let's just let him do his job. Let him do his job Now. This is all fine, well and good until the episode starts progressing. The girl's not changing her story. There's gonna have to be a hearing.

Speaker 1:

Sid's little sister shows up. Her name is Abby and I was. I don't know what I was expecting. I think I was expecting maybe a teenager, but she's divorced. She jumps out of the car and she has two kids. She has a little girl and a little boy and the little boy only speaks through like this Do you all remember little tykes? Like it's a, it's a horn, it's a plastic horn. He only blows through that to speak and the little girl, who's a little bit older than the little boy, just copies everything you say. So it's super annoying, but they pulled into the cul-de-sac and it's a kind of a refreshing moment. Everybody gets to take a breather. Sid is talking to his sister like I'm so glad you made it. She's like yeah, yeah, absolutely, kid. The cousins are, you know, dealing with the little cousins, even though they're acting kind of weird. I mean, it is what it is. Everybody goes inside and Karen and Sid throw a good old fashioned kickback.

Speaker 1:

Now, throughout the whole time as everyone is being introduced to Abby, you can tell Karen is still thinking about this, as she should, and so is Sid. He's getting a little nervous, so they have their conversation in the kitchen and she tries again. Sid, let's just talk to the criminal defense lawyer. Let's just let's I just let's make sure everything goes as planned. At least there's no harm in having this conversation, at least having him. Let's get on his radar before anything else happens.

Speaker 1:

And Richard is once again no, let's let him do his job. Let's let Richard do his job. And this is the first time Karen comes out and says it. She's like Richard is incompetent. I don't want him doing this for you. Sid's like no, this is what he does. He's a lawyer. Plus, he's gonna go talk to the girl. Karen's like okay, that's cool, that's a good idea. Sid's like yeah, I was gonna do it myself. She's like are you an idiot? You can't go over there. You need to stay as far away from her as the east is from the west. You don't need to be anywhere near this girl. Don't talk to her, don't send, send her nothing, don't do anything. And he's like oh yeah, I guess you're right and you just go back to this. Oh my God, this is one of the most gullible kind of unbothered people on earth, which is why she's like man. You trust people too easily. I don't trust Richard with your freedom. I don't like it. We need to call this other guy. So we need to call this other guy.

Speaker 1:

So meanwhile, at the kickback we get to see Valene in Gary sober as judge. Richard and Laura comes over and she's pumped. She's really loving her real estate job. So I'm assuming she's going to get a real estate career. I was kind of thinking that would be Valene's thing, and I really do think this is me coming from watching the Real Housewives of the OC. I'm thinking of Vicky. Vicky. Isn't she like an insurance maven or something like that? So I figured that's what one of them will do build like this whole empire for themselves. I was kind of leaning towards Valene because it seems like she has the most to gain. You know, she's got her GED. Let her get some community college under her belt. She's her. She's good at everything. Kind of that's what I thought I saw coming. Maybe that'll still happen. But Laura is super pumped about the real estate industry. Richard is still silently hating. All you do is look, ma'am, you're not in the real estate business, you're in the saliva and envelope business, just being terrible for no reason.

Speaker 1:

So Ginger is sitting on the couch. When there's a knock at the door and guess who it is it's Kenny. Kenny comes in. Hey, what's going on? I'm just looking for you. She didn't want to talk to him. She's like dude, we're separate, you're not supposed to be here. I know, but no one was at home. What's going on? How's it going? Over walks Abby and she's like and who is this? Now, she's a little flirty. It took me two episodes, watching them twice, to realize that she's supposed to be the sex pot on this episode, and I only know it when they play the, that kind of music. When she walks, I'm like oh sorry, I didn't. I didn't catch that at all. She just seemed a little bit flustered to me and she looks so much like Ginger. I was having a little bit of trouble, like I do that recalibration every time I saw her. Okay, that's not Ginger. Anyway, kenny comes over. You can tell everybody's kind of looking at him at the side of their eye. It's just awkward. Ginger is telling him to leave and he's completely unfazed. Sid comes out of the kitchen hey, kenny, hang out for a while.

Speaker 1:

So flash forward to the next day. It would appear that Abby and the kids stayed the night and the little boy goes over and he gets the newspaper. He brings it up to Karen and Sid, blowing into the horn, all in their sleepy faces. But when they look at the paper it's a mess. It says you know this local car dealer charged with assault on a minor or something to that effect. So it is bad.

Speaker 1:

Things are not going well, richard, so I'm going to fast forward. He does end up making his way over to the girl's house. You can tell right away she's not going to back up on this. She's not the type of girl who is fighting for justice. She wants that money. So he secretly offers her just that.

Speaker 1:

Now her mom comes around the corner. She's this redheaded lady. I've seen her in so many things. She was definitely in um, what's that movie with Junior where he's a problem child? I thought she was a lady from the Drew Carey show, but that's not her. I'm going to look her name up, you'll know exactly who I'm talking about. So this is Mrs, I think, messenger Kissinger, something like that. I forget what Pam's last name is.

Speaker 1:

Her mom confronts Richard like how dare you? So your friend tries to rape her. Now you want to try to buy her. You're trying to bribe us. We don't lie, you can get your stuff, you can get out. This makes Richard all kinds of upset. He's sweating bullets. Richard's trying to keep set on the up and up, trying to keep his spirits high. Dude, don't worry, it's going to be fine, I promise. Karen still isn't buying it, though she's like he's not. I'm sorry he halfway does everything. I just don't like him halfway doing this. He hadn't discredited her or anything.

Speaker 1:

So the day of the hearing comes it's on a Tuesday morning, all the evidence is laid out and the judge decides that there is probable cause. They were all kind of banking on this being dropped before it went to trial, but it looks like it has to go to trial now. Sid is gobsmacked, karen is floored, richard is sick to his stomach and little Miss Pam is smirking from ear to ear. She's even convinced her mom that this is happening. So they're smirking ear to ear, convinced her mom that this is happening. So they're smirking ear to ear. It's a mess. It's a mess but it's such a I'm glad that this happened.

Speaker 1:

Not that, whatever you know, it's a TV. It's entertaining, but it's. It's fun to now see what this is going to do to Richard and Sid's relationship and Richard and Karen, because she already feels a way. She knows he's not and she's. He's not the most upstanding person. He's shown that more times in a little bit, but I think when it comes to family, this is so personal. This is man's freedom, his reputation. This is horrible. This is not a good thing and the last thing you want is somebody who's incompetent. So I'm with her. I'm team Karen per usual on this one. Oh, there was one little scene that I left out. This one was very entertaining. This season I've already seen some bloopers. I'm enjoying it. Two scenes we got to talk about that are sort of inconsequential.

Speaker 1:

So Diana is on the phone. She's in her little white jumpsuit and she's talking super loud at breakfast morning and she's oh, of course, of course I can. Yeah. So her little boyfriend, the guy from the Kiss cover band, is on the phone. Of course I can. Yeah, so her little boyfriend, the guy from the Kiss cover band, is on the phone and apparently he was impressed with either her tap dancing or her singing. He was so impressed with her raw talent that he is inviting her to be the lead singer of the band. Now I had to listen to this twice. I said are you sure, singer, she can definitely tap dance to some rock music. I don't think I've ever seen that that's. That's got to be one heck of a show. She was very good at that. But he wants her to sing and she's like, yeah, I'll practice 25 hours a day and I'm like baby, you're gonna need it. So she's been invited to be the lead singer and I'm lord, have mercy, what we will do for love.

Speaker 1:

Well, let's talk about Miss Abby. So Abby has these two kids this is Sid's little sister. She's significantly younger than him with the two kids and it's she's happy, she's friendly, she's definitely charming and she's a little bit flirty. She's a little bit flirty with Richard. She's definitely flirting with almost called him with, uh Kenny when he comes by to see his estranged wife. She's definitely flirty there. She's flirting with Gary. Only Valine doesn't seem to mind, because valine is more enamored with these kids.

Speaker 1:

So the little girl who's copying everything everyone says comes downstairs in her pjs and she's like mom, I'm ready to go to bed. I forgot my books. Can we unpack them? Her mom's like, no, just read one of one of diane's. So she goes, okay, cool, ends up going upstairs and valine sees something in her, so she follows her. So you know, valene goes in the room. Hi, little girl, little girl. Hi, little girl, how you doing? How you doing what you not going to do? This is just a public service. And now what you're not going to do is talk faster than a Southern woman. So Valene clicks her heels, goes back to Sleepy Hollow or Vidalia, georgia, wherever she's from, and she puts that fish in third gear. Hey, little girl, I just came up here to check on you Because little girl Ms Ronda thought she was kind of sad.

Speaker 1:

I thought I'd come up here and talk to you a little bit. I have a little girl too. I have her, but she's left out in Texas. She's left Texas, lolita leave her. Gary on account of him being a drunk and me on account of me running away and having a good relationship with her. I just didn't know what to say. So I thought I'd come up here and talk to you and see how you can do it. Baby Little girl can't keep up.

Speaker 1:

And that was just. I mean, she didn't even really, she didn't even really warmed up. So the little girl's like, oh fine, I'm bored. She eventually does open up to Vidalia and she tells her that we're getting a divorce. She's upset, she's sad, she doesn't really want to talk. So the best thing to do when you don't want to talk is just mock Valine. It's like well, don't worry, baby, listen, I understand, it's a hard time for you. She slows it down for her out of respect. She's like don't play with me, little girl. I get me in the matchbox car. Man Can go toe to toe, don't mess with me. But she sees something she misses Lucy. You can tell she's longing for this motherhood that she was robbed of. So she climbs into bed with a little girl. She starts reading her this story. I guess they're reading Black Beauty. I was mildly concerned with what kind of books Diana would have, but I mean she's a teenager so I guess it wouldn't be that bad. She's reading what? Reading them? Um, what's her name? Abby, almost called her Gabby. Gabby, abby, whoever comes upstairs and see this and she's like she's fine with it. It's an odd relationship though.

Speaker 1:

As we go into episode two, valene kind of takes on this whole. You know we'll get into that. That's gonna be. That's it. That's all for this episode. Where are you like the 40? It's already run a little bit long, but I'm going to continue with part two of the season opener, which would be episode two Nuts Landing the Hitchhiker. Part two we're going to trial, we're going to backtrack, we're going to find evidence. We've got to figure out a way to get Sid free and clear of this fiasco. In the meantime, in between time, baby, lock your door. You see some little girl panhandling trying to get four blocks away. Let her walk. It's good for her. Keep your friends closed, your enemies closing and your doors locked, eyes straight ahead, hands at two and ten. We have no time for the foolishness. Stay moisturized, stay hydrated, mind your own business and keep all of your drama on TV. Thank you.